THE WEDDING DAY; HAPPY BUT DEMANDING
A marriage that conforms to legal requirements protects those involved in many ways, such as by defining responsibilities towards the children (including maintenance and education) and rights of inheritance. There are also laws designed to protect family members from abuse and exploitation, thus the wedding day is truly a unique day.
Once it is decided that a couple will marry and that the marriage will conform to Bible laws and principles as well as to the law of the land, what practical matters must be considered? Among these are the date and type of wedding ceremony desired. “it may be that the couple’s ideas do not fit exactly with those of the parents, and they may feel torn between choosing exactly what they want and following the family traditions,” says one book on the subject. What can be done? There are no easy solutions to this, except to listen tactfully, talk problems through, and compromise. It is an emotional time for everyone, and a little forethought and understanding will go a long way to making the arrangements easier.”- The complete wedding organizer and record.
Although loving parents can do much to ensure the success of the day, they should resist the temptation to impose their own wishes. On the other hand, though final decisions will be made by the bride and groom, they should listen to well-intentioned advice.
Preparations include various activities, from sending invitations to organizing the reception. “The more orderly this preparation is, the more foresight and planning are applied, the less will be the fatigue and tension.” There will be errands to run and quests to entertain. Can friends or family make themselves available to help? Could some of the things that the bride and groom do not necessary have to do themselves be delegated to other responsible ones?
A reasonable budget is essential. It is not reasonable or loving to expect a couple or their parents to go into debts to pay for a wedding that is beyond their means. Many who can afford a more elaborate wedding still choose to keep it modest. In any event, some couples have found it helpful to have a checklist for estimated and actual expenses. It can also be useful to have a list of deadlines for all the things that need to be organized. Entrusting deadlines to memory is very likely to be stressful.
How much will the wedding cost? Prices differ from place to place, but wherever you live, it would be wise to ask yourself: ‘can we afford all the things we have planned? Are they really necessary? Even if you can afford more, you may still want to keep things simple.
Considering the importance of the event, the desire to do something special is understandable. But whatever is decided upon should be done with balance. Though some spend a fortune, others are happy to economize-or do so because they have no other choice. Avoid the trend of trying to have a bigger and better wedding than others. consider the extravagant veils two brides in one land wore-one veil was 13 meters in diameter and weighed some 220 kilograms; another was 300 meters long, requiring 100 bridesmaids to carry. Would it be in harmony on sound principles to imitate such spectacles?
Should we follow tradition or not?
Wedding traditions vary from country to country, thus it is impossible to comment on all of them. When deciding whether they will follow a certain custom, the couple would do well to ask themselves: ‘what is its meaning? Is it tied to a superstition that is a good-luck or fertility wish? Is it connected with false religion or other practices condemned by the Bible? Is it unreasonable or unloving? Could it embarrass or stumble others? Could it raise doubts about the couple’s motives? Is it in bad taste?’ if doubts exist on any of these points, it would be better to avoid that tradition and, if necessary, let guests know of the decision ahead of time.
A simple preparations checklist:
6 months or more ahead;
– discuss plans with future husband or wife, in-laws, and parents.
-decides on type of wedding desire.
-work out budget.
-check legal requirements
-book reception location
-choose (from existing wardrobe), purchase, or sew wedding garments
-choose and order invitations
– send invitation
-obtain necessary documentation
-Try on wedding outfits
-confirm orders and appointments made
-write thank you letters for any gifts already received.
-start taking personal belongings to new accommodation
-make sure all helpers know what is expected of them.
– arrange for return of any hired or borrowed items
-delegate everything possible to others.
Some brides fear that something will go terribly wrong on their wedding day- that the car will get flat tire and arrive at the ceremony late, that the weather will be foul, or that the wedding gown will be irreparably damaged at the last minute. Probably none of that will happen. However, be realistic. Not everything can run perfectly. Setbacks have to be accepted. Try not to lose your sense of humour in the face of difficulties, and keep a positive outlook. Should something go amiss, remember that in years to come, you may laugh about it as you tell the tale. Do not let minor mishaps mar the joy of the wedding itself.